I think all moms would admit that they wouldn’t mind being more patient! It’s something we can all use, isn’t it? Did you know that organizing is the key to being a more patient mom?
You haven’t checked to see that the kids have been doing their math in weeks. When you do, you’re astonished that it hasn’t been done.
Truth be told, you’re mad. How could they be so dishonest and even lazy?
Your older kids can do a lot of chores independently. So when you have to take an important phone call that ended up lasting longer than planned, you were sure the kids were working. Only they weren’t. You find that they’ve been goofing off the whole time.
And now you’re beyond frustrated.
Maybe these two scenarios aren’t you, but they’ve been me. I knew I had problem children whose character needed a tune-up. But I was only half right.
Organizing is the key to being a more patient mom!
I was angry about my kids’ behavior and I let them know that I meant business. I raised my voice and my tone was superior. As a result, they were contrite. They promised to catch up with their math and to do better the next time I couldn’t supervise them.
But I didn’t feel good about our discussion. Not only had I lost my temper, but I realized I wasn’t really mad at them.
I was mad at myself.
I hadn’t been checking their work on a regular basis. I had avoided it just like they’d avoided math. I also didn’t have a checklist of chores for them to complete on their own. They were used to depending on me to tell them what they had to do before having free time. My lack of organization and time management had directly led to my impatience with my kids.
Early on in my homeschooling, I didn’t have any sort of routine. My days were willy-nilly. I thought that was the beauty of homeschooling! I could get up at any time and teach at any time. But that freedom from routine is what led to overwhelm and frustration with myself and my kids. I was ready to give up homeschooling and I was certainly not going to have more children. I obviously couldn’t handle the three that I had!
When I found FLYLady online, I learned to embrace routine. Everyone was happier, but I was happiest of all. Without a predictable rhythm to my days, my kids were whiny and dependent. They looked to me to determine what we would do all day.
With a routine, my kids were excited about the day and often reminded me what was coming next. Happy kids made me happier. My self-image improved, too. Where I once saw myself as lazy and unproductive, my routine both reminded me of what to do and served as a record of what I’d accomplished.
Resistance to routine can quickly lead to not spending time in the Word and prayer, not going to church, not exercising, not cleaning, and not checking our kids’ work. There are days when you and the kids won’t feel like doing anything productive.
Taking the day off is a perk of homeschooling. I love it! But frequently taking days off can become the routine and the consequences aren’t pleasant.
Without a routine for our most important activities, we will find ourselves without the peace that comes from devotional time, without the energy that comes from exercising, and without the sense of control that comes from an orderly home and school. We are ripe for impatience, anger, and a fit of rage that we will regret.
Certainly lack of sleep, poor health, financial stress, and relationship troubles can contribute to impatience. But organizing with routines is a major step toward a change in our own (and our kids’) character. Doing what should be done on a regular basis, regardless of the whims of the moment trains us and our children to be faithful servants who bear the fruit of the spirit.
Most moms think of organizing as an event. It’s something we do in a week during the summer or over a long weekend. When we have time to devote solely to organizing (which is rare), we typically find that all of our work is quickly undone. The school room, the kids’ closets, and the play room are just as messy as they were before our organizing session. And rooms are just one of the areas of our lives that require organization. Homeschool moms have curriculum to buy and sell, and all moms have chore charts to set up and meals to plan.
If we want to get and stay organized in all the areas of our lives, we need to make organizing a routine. Every day or week, we must be organizing and not just cleaning.
After adopting FLYLady’s routines for cleaning my house, I realized that I wanted a plan just for homeschooling moms. I wanted to be reminded to get my used curriculum ready to sell. I wanted to remember to put Christmas activities on the calendar, so I wouldn’t miss them. I wanted to spend time planning ways to make my marriage stronger. But I couldn’t find a plan like that. So I created one.
I made a list of 52 areas of my homeschool life that I wanted to organize. I broke each area down into four 15-minute missions and scheduled them throughout the year. That plan is called The Organized Homeschool Life. Moms can take the book and follow the plan to feel more in control of their lives and schools.
I began following the plan and loved it. But I needed a way to fit my weekly organizing missions into my schedule. That’s when I created The Organized Homeschool Life Planner.
The organizing missions are already planned for each week in the undated planner. A weekly meal plan helps us make cooking a part of our routine. The daily page reminds us to spend time with God, complete an organizing task, and focus on relationships. Each day we can create a loose schedule for completing our most important tasks. It’s not a lesson planner but a way of helping mom organize her days and her life.
Without a doubt, The Organized Homeschool Life book and planner have made me a more patient mom. In using a routine, I feel more at peace and more in control of my time than ever.
If lack of organization leads you to impatience too, I would love to share these tools with you. From now through November 17th, 2018, both resources are being offered at a significant discount – no coupons required.
Jesus was the most patient person who ever lived. It’s not coincidental that while he responded to the spontaneous promptings of the Father, he also had a routine. He met with His Father early in the day, so He could accomplish the work He was sent to do. When we allow God to use routine to build our character, we can become the patient moms we long to be.
What part of your life could most benefit from a routine?
Dr. Melanie Wilson is a Christian psychologist turned homeschooling mother of six. She is the author of The Organized Homeschool Life book and planner and Grammar Galaxy language arts curriculum. You can find her at Psychowith6.com and podcasting at http://homeschoolsanity.com/.
