Should you always say yes to your child?
We worked hard to get them to say “Mama” and “Dada”. We spent time encouraging them to say “love you!”. What a joy it was each time they would repeat these words that we’d been trying to get them to say. However, it was not such a joy the first time the word “No!” came out of their mouth!
It shouldn’t have been a surprise to us, considering how often while training them, we used that word. When they started to touch something they shouldn’t, we said “No!” When they started going towards the bottom step to climb up, we said “No!”
Now please understand, that it’s necessary as moms to use the word “no”, so we can keep our kids from situations where they can get hurt. The potential problem though is that in saying “no” so many times throughout the day, we let it become a habit. This habit carries over well past the training stage. It’s easy to just start saying no to many of their requests.
Some of the reasons we often say “no” instead of yes to our kids are:
- Because yes is inconvenient and requires work, prep, or clean-up
- We are tired
- It’s annoying
- We are busy
- We have too much to do
- We just don’t want to
I still remember the first time I realized how quick I was to say no to the kids.
It was the first snow of the winter, and of course, the kids all wanted to go out and play in the snow. They asked eagerly if they could go out, and in my mind, I didn’t see happy kids having fun in the snow. I saw all the time involved in putting on snowsuits, hats, mittens, and boots.
Then I envisioned the piles of wet snowsuits, mittens, hats, and boots that would soon be all over my kitchen floor.
So I said “No. Not right now.” (meaning, probably not that day)
I saw their little faces fall, and immediately felt bad realizing how quickly they lost their excitement, simply because I didn’t want to be inconvenienced!
Then I thought about how often I had been saying no instead of yes, just because it was a bother to me.
As I thought about it, I decided that it was time for me to quit being an uptight Mom who never had the patience or time to allow fun things. Does that mean I started to say yes to every request my kids made? Of course not! But I did make it a goal to just say yes whenever I could.
As a mom, you should say just YES to your kids whenever there’s no good reason to say no!
Sometimes saying yes to the simplest thing will make their day — a walk around the block, eating lunch outside on a blanket, building a fort for them to play in, etc. It might be a little bit inconvenient, but we need to let the kids have fun and be kids.
Often when the kids were irritable or bored, I found that saying yes to one of their requests was the best thing I could do!
The smile on their faces makes the little bit of extra work, or the inconvenience worth it.
In the journey of parenting, finding the right balance between “yes” and “no” can be a tough task. It’s important to protect our children from harm and teach them boundaries, but it’s equally important to let them experience the joy of “yes.”
Saying “yes” doesn’t just mean agreeing to their requests; it signifies creating moments of connection, fostering their creativity, and nurturing their sense of exploration. A simple “yes” can turn an ordinary day into an adventure, a chore into a bonding opportunity, and a frown into a radiant smile.
So, as parents, let’s remember the magic of “yes.” Let’s look for those opportunities to say “yes” to our children, not only for their sake but also for our own. It’s in those “yes” moments that we witness the purest forms of childhood delight, and we create cherished memories that will last a lifetime.
As you navigate the challenges and joys of parenting, consider this: Saying “yes” can be a powerful affirmation of love, trust, and togetherness. Embrace the power of “yes,” and watch your family flourish in ways you never imagined.
Will you look for opportunities to say YES to your kids today?
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